‘Once Upon a One More Time’ a jukebox mess

‘ONCE UPON A ONE MORE TIME’: The cast. Photo: Matthew Murphy.

ONCE UPON A ONE MORE TIME
Book by Jon Hartmere
Based on music performed & recorded by Britney Spears
Creative Consultant David Leveaux
Directed & choreographed by Keone & Mari Madrid
Marquis Theatre
1535 Broadway at 45th Street
(877-250-2929), www.OneMoreTimeMusical.com

By David NouNou

The hubris in  Jon Hartmere’s book for Once Upon a One More Time is both silly and ludicrous—expecting most audience members attending this insipid show to know about Betty Friedan and her 1963 book The Feminine Mystique. It seems only my middle-aged partner and I attending Friday evening’s performance found the mention of the book hilarious. When Cinderella (Briga Heelan) meets fairy Godmother, O.F.G (Brooke Dillan), our heroine is given Friedan’s feminist manifesto  to read to understand women’s lib. She’s supposed to free herself of the fairy tale chains. When Cinderella marries the prince in the end for the requisite “happily ever after,” the joke about the mention of Friedan and her book landed like a thud. However, our raucous laughter at that line had nearby audience members looking at us and wondering what was so funny. The irony of the moment escaped all the tweens and the 40-something wannabe tweens. Britney Spears is indeed a pop icon, but what does she have to do with feminism? This is one of the many confusing notions tossed into this mess of a jukebox musical.

Cinderella had a very busy year this year. In the last 12 months, she’s been featured in no less than three musicals. She was first featured in Stephen Sondheim’s brilliant City Center revival of Into the Woods where she finds out that marrying the prince doesn’t necessarily mean it ended happily ever after. Her woes just began.

In the second incarnation was the dreadful Andrew Lloyd Webber musical Bad Cinderella which in comparison to this would be a masterpiece. In Webber’s version, she’s a bad girl who refuses to marry the prince because she discovers a whole new world out there.

In this third abysmal version, she is referred to as Cin. She and her sisters Snow White, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty, Little Mermaid are all dating the same Prince Charming (Justin Guarini);  Belle, Esmeralda, Goldilocks, Little Red Riding Hood are not dating him but are thrown in for good measure to complete the fairy tale characters. Cin helps teach all these young ladies to break the chains of the characters they portray and think outside the box. Now you will ask yourself what the heck does all this have to do with “Based on the Music Performed and Recorded by Britney Spears”? Absolutely nothing. The songs—including all the Britney classics from “Baby One More Time” and “Oops…I Did It Again” to “Toxic and “Stronger”— and the dance moves are wedged in to no effective advantage or advancing the narrative in this lame storyline, other than giving the tweens and the 40-something wannabe tweens an excuse to shriek, snap, holler, and whistle every time they hear one of her songs or recognize one of the dance steps. Truth be told, Ms. Spears’ songs were put to much better use in last fall’s excellent production of & Juliet.

Adding to the confusion, one wonders how much of the music and songs were on pre-recorded tracks because we never really see the musicians—other than a screenshot of musicians projected onto the stage at the end of the show.

I will end this review on a high note. Thank God for Jennifer Simard as the Stepmother. Her mere presence—whether in the musicals Disaster or Company—always manages to breathe oxygen into any part she plays.

Edited by Scott Harrah
Published July 10, 2023
Reviewed at July 7, 2023 press performance.

‘ONCE UPON A ONE MORE TIME’: Briga Heelan. Photo: Matthew Murphy.

‘ONCE UPON A ONE MORE TIME’: Brooke Dillman (center) & cast. Photo: Matthew Murphy.

‘ONCE UPON A ONE MORE TIME’: Justin Guarini & cast. Photo: Matthew Murphy.